personal experience >>> drug addicts >>> interview 3 >>>
A: Hi, come in…
A: Please, take a seat!
B: You wanted to ask some questions?
A: Yes, if it is not a problem for you…
B: No, go ahead.
A: How old are you?
B: I’m 21.
A: What do you work or want to work?
B: I have a profession. I’m a cook.
A: Do you work somewhere at the moment?
B: No, I quitted one week ago.
A: When was the first time you used a narcotic substance?
B: It was 4 years ago. First it was joint then heroin.
A: Did you like it the first time you tried heroin?
B: Yes, I did. But now the feeling is even better.
A: What kind of feeling is it?
B: I cannot define it. You’ve got to experience it to understand it…
A: Do you think that someone, who hasn’t tried any drug of any kind, can fully enjoy life?
B: No…I mean it is not necessary to try at all.
A: Who made you do it? A friend, a girlfriend?
B: A classmate of mine.
A: What about your parents? Do they know?
B: Yes, they do.
A: Did they make you search for therapy?
B: No. It was me, who wanted it…Last year during the summer I went to an excursion, during which I didn’t take drugs at all.
A: What made start all over again?
B: When I got back…when we gathered with the old friends…
A: Do you keep in touch with them?
B: No…I haven’t seen them for two or three weeks now.
A: How do you see your life in the future?
B: First I want to stop taking drugs…
A: You are determined, aren’t you?
B: Yes, I am, then – job, family, kids…I don’t know what the future holds for me…
A: Recently, people often talk about legalization of some drugs, for example joint. What is your opinion about it?
B: Yes, I think they should be, but there have to be specific places, where it can be sold, not everywhere around the city.
A: Do you feel guilty? For example because you have disappointed your closest friends, your family…
B: Practically, I am from the type of people, who would enjoy anything that life has to offer…this was my mistake…I tried and I became an addict…
A: So you feel bad because you became an addict, not because you’ve tried a narcotic at all?
B: Yes, because if it is only once it is no great deal, but when you do it for a long time…
A: Does this mean that once you’ve tried you just didn’t have the will to say “no”? Didn’t you know what was going to happen?
B: Yes, I had some idea. I’ve heard people talk about abstinence, crisis and I said to myself that once I feel it coming I’ll stop at once. But it turned out I can’t. This abstinence syndrome comes about in the 6th month after I’ve started drugs. First…I couldn’t sleep…I started sweating…
A: Have you stopped taking heroin because of the therapy or…?
B: I’m bringing down the dose.
A: So you’re willing to give up everything and get treatment?
B: Yes, I’m determined. Otherwise, there is no point. First I’ll stay at the hospital about a month and when I get out, together with the old friends…
A: You’ll start all over again. What about the comuna? If you go to one of the Spanish ones, don’t you think it would be difficult for you, without knowing the language at all and all?
B: But the conditions are much more favorable. There is always someone accompanying you. This person, called a “shadow”, helps you if you have any kind of problems.
A: And when you come back?
B: May be I won’t come back. May be I’ll stay there. No…I’ll surely come back to tell my family and friends how was it there and then go back…
A: And then would you like to help others?
B: Yes, of course.
A: And if you see someone, who is doing it for the first time would you stop him.
B: Yes, I would…I’ll tell him my story…I hope he will understand…
A: The rumor goes that most of the drug-addicts sell their whole property to get money to buy more drugs.
B: Yes, I also sold different things – clothes, leather jackets mostly. But this was at the beginning…I’ve also sold expensive shoes and so on.
A: How did your parents find out?
B: First some people from school called home. I denied, of course, because we have talked about it a lot in the past at home…I said that I’ll never do it…My parents believed me first, but when they saw my arms…they got the picture…First, when I was only smoking, there was no way they could find out, but when I started the injections…
A: Injections in the veins or somewhere else?
B: Mainly in the veins.
A: Do you use sterile syringes or…
A: Don’t you fear the injections might be lethal for you?
B: Yes, I do but the need is much more powerful than this fear…Haven’t you ever thought about trying only once and then stop…
A: I personally, haven’t.
B: …just to see what it feels like.
A: But there has been cases, in which the first time is the most unpleasant one – you wish you had never taken it in the first place.
B: I don’t know, but I enjoyed it when I took heroin the first time. I smoked is “on folio”.
A: Were you alone?
B: No, there were two of us.
A: Some say they can’t recall anything from the period the dose had its effect.
B: If the dose was increased more than necessary, yes, it is possible.
A: What do you think can replace the wonderful feeling for you? A girlfriend perhaps?
B: Yes, although I lost mine. We broke up.
A: Did she know you are an addict?
B: Yes. She tried to help me but she couldn’t…I had anther girlfriend who begged me to give them some heroin for them to try just once but…when we both started there was no turning back. She started to hide from me, saying she did not take any, but I was sure she had. I could just tell from the way she looked at me.
A: How did you feel about her when you were on drugs?
B: When you are no drugs, girlfriends don’t interest you, you don’t want anything else from the world…
A: All right. I think that would be enough. Thank you very much for your help.
B: No problem.
A: Good bye.