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Breaking up happens all the time. We each have the tendency to think that our breakup was unique. That it was special in some way. That somehow, it was a whole lot worse than anyone else's. The truth is, breaking up is simply part of dating. If you're willing to take a chance and accept someone in your life, you have to to learn to let go.

A Few Suggestions

We humans tend to keep making the same mistakes -- for example, dating the same type of man over and over -- until we take some time to reflect and learn from them. I would suggest that you have a period where you are not dating anyone. It's going to be hard, but I think that time alone is the best remedy to think through the patterns of your relationships.

Time alone will also give you a chance to think about what qualities you really want in a boyfriend, so that you don't head out there and find another guy who's just like all the rest.

Call your girlfriends, spend time with your family, sit alone in a cafe and read or think. Give it at least three months, more if you can stand it, before you start dating anyone again. The strength that you build from being alone will serve you well in the long run.

Contributed by Kim Donahue via email.

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