Don't Worry, Be Happy
So stop worrying about what you're going to say next. Focus all your attention and energy on listening to what the woman is saying to you. Try to visualize or "feel" what she's saying.
This does take a little effort. It's not very hard to do, but it's not something that men "naturally" do. You simply have to concentrate.
Now when listening you want to pay particular attention to any "seeds" or free information she happens to throw your way. Seeds refer to subtle hints that women give that point to conversational topics that they would like to or be willing to discuss.
An example:
Bob: You come here often?
Kim: Actually this is my first time here. Just moved here from Florida.
Bob: Oh. I come here every week. I love this band. It's pretty crowded tonight.
Bob is clueless. Kim gives him plenty of free information to follow up on. It's almost as if she's testing him to see if he has the intelligence or social skills to capitalize on what she says. Bob fails.
So what would be the "right" thing to say?
Well... she mentions that this is her first time in the club and she just moved here from Florida. Bob could have properly "watered the seeds" by asking
a) How does she like the club, band, etc?
b) What brought her here from Florida?
c) How long has she been in the area?
d) Where in Florida is she from?
e) How long was she there?
f) What's it like there?
Kim's two short sentences gave Bob tons of information to follow up on. Tons of conversational topics that she has indirectly indicated that she'd like to talk about. But Bob was too worried about himself. Too worried about the impression he was making. Too worried about what to say next to
actually listen to what she said.
Do you see the importance of listening now? You must concentrate on what she says and block everything else out of your mind. If you listen you never have to worry about what to say next because the other person is "telling" you exactly what to say.
For more information on successfully meeting, dating, and attracting women, visit
the very informative Don Juan Center at: http://www.globalmarketing.nu
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