South Park: Bigger, Longer, and Uncut
Well, I guess we should have expected it. A South Park movie. Go figure. A hit television series brought to the theatre by popular demand. A cult following to follow it and fuel the producers' pockets for the next three millenniums or so. And then a slow descend out of the people's minds and out into oblivion until the sequel or else the season finale. We saw it with Transformers, we saw it with Wee's Big Adventure (hey, don't laugh, he rocks - oh yeah? I know you are, but what am I?), we even saw a different form of it with all of those Saturday Night Live skit spin-offs. I could name many more, but I don't want to.
But what many of the directors and producers of those TV-to-silverscreen hits didn't seem to realize is that a television show is very different from a movie. A TV show consists of easy setup settings, usually a low budget to work on, monotonous camera angles, a whole lot of room for editing and a lot shorter story to work with. A movie consists of careful plotting, thoughtful character growth, interesting camera angles, usually special effects or some sort of special theatre flare, and are often meant to speak a powerful message to the viewer (I did say often. Take into mind, oh say, It's Pat, and that really doesn't apply, now does it?). Well, I have one thing to emphasize: South Park: Bigger Longer, and Uncut TOTALLY takes on a different road from its TV-to- movie predecessors.
South Park: Bigger, Longer, and Uncut is just as crude and funny as the Comedy Central hit, and then some. It is bigger, longer, and uncut. Bet you didn't know that, did you? Shyeah right! Whatever. I know I got you on that one. Liar. But it's all true. Especially the uncut part. No cuss word, no explicit material was censored or stricken from the record. South Park hits your funny bone hard, then bashes it, the movie takes that same funny bone and bashes your other funny bone (any normal moron would understand what I mean) until it hurts to even let out another giggle.
The movie begins with loveable little (innocent, yeah right!) Stan coming over a snowy hill as the violins and glockenspiels begin to flare. And what follows in the next five minutes is a beautiful musical opening full of humor and creative intros of the loveable little tykes we all know and love: Stan, Kyle, Kenny and Cartman. Stan gets money from his mother to go see the new Terrance and Phillip movie (actually probably the first one), and proceeds to each of his friend's houses to spill the huge news. The excitement the boys feel can best be described on how Cartman reacts, "What're you guys doing here? (Stan shows the poster) Aw, sweet! SWEEEEET!" The Terrance and Phillip movie, Terrance and Phillip: Asses of Fire, turns out to be much more than the show we're used to by these two joggle-headed artists, they cuss at every turn and the boys all find this so cool. And of course everyone at school thinks them gods for getting in to the thing (I'm not telling you HOW they did, that would spoil it), and eventually the whole class is cussing. This immediately causes the principal to call in the parents, who, understandably are furious and embarrassed beyond compare. A quick lesson from Mr. Mackey (the school counselor) himself (through a hilarious song no one will forget) was supposed to set the kids straight, and when it doesn't, Kyle's mom takes over and things get outta' hand. To put it short what chaos follows from this point: The USA wages war on Canada, the Baldwin Mansion is annihilated, Terrance and Phillip are captured and taken as prisoners in the US (they're Canadians, duh! Can't you tell by their flapping heads?), the children form a resistance, La Resistance, to be exact, Satan and Sudam Hussein break up, Satan tries to take over the world, and, oh yeah....Kenny dies (BOOM! Bet you didn't expect that one coming, did you? CHE! You're such a liar!). But it's all worth it to see Kenny hoodless, and finally given justice as a human being (you'll find out what I mean).
You gotta' love the brilliant mockery of Disney's playful songs, formed into crude, hilarious, catchy farces (I bought the soundtrack, so should you). Then there's the absolutely smart writing, timing each event and joke appropriately to give it that South Park effect. I got to say, I loved this movie. I was totally surprised at just how good it turned out. Now I know to expect nothing less from Parker and Stone.
One quick word of warning, it's rated NC-17 for a reason, and you have to be seventeen to enter even with a parent, unless the ticket guy's a moron or else your Uncle Sam. You see you have to be mature enough to understand the lessons trying to be taught through this immaturity, and if you can't understand a word of what this sentence has said, then you're not old enough to go, or else you and aren't watching this great TV show the mature way (as if their is any).
Grade: A+