Name: Ivana
Location: Karlovac, Croatia

"They are just people. And I don't believe that people can be bad just because their skin is not the same color as mine, or because of their nationality. People are individuals, they cannot be categorized. They can only be good or bad, and that has nothing to do with their appearance or origin."

-Ivana

Those are the words of a dynamic young lady named Ivana. She is one of the many whose childhoods were consumed by the terrors of war, yet she is also one who carries an incredible dignity and courage. One thing that stands the clearest is her hope for the future.

During the month of March, Jocelyn contacted Ivana. Ivana lives in Karlovac, Croatia, a country that broke independent from Yugoslavia and went through the war. During this month of March, there was a terrible conflict happening in Kosovo. By conversing with someone living in Croatia, our team gained a whole different perspective on the wars.

She requested that personal information about herself be left out of the letters. What follows are quotes, that provide much insight and inspiration.

Ivana's words speak clearly. She gave to our team a priceless gift of enlightenment.

Ivana's reply, March 27, 1999

Hi!

I'm very happy to hear you would like to know something more about my country and our way of life. Of course I'll answer all of your questions.

Couple of months ago I got a message on my ICQ [an Internet Instant Messenger] from an American person who asked me where Croatia is, is it in Asia or something. That made me feel sad and a bit angry, so I wrote him a letter, which I'm sending to you in attachment. You'll find out some basic facts of Croatian history, and our life nowadays if you decide to read it. (It's pretty long I'm afraid :-)) It's been written before the latest events, so I'll just make a short comment on NATO attacks: If they did it ten years ago, nothing of this would have happened. I would have had nice childhood and teenage years, as well as many others. Many children would have still had fathers and still lived in their homes. I absolutely hate bombs and shooting after everything I've gone through, but the force is the only language those people understand, and that's the only thing that can make them leave neighboring nations alone. I feel sorry for people who are suffering right now, no matter what nationality they are, but Western countries are finally doing the right thing.

That's it, I gave you plenty of reading material :-)) Hope to hear from you soon,

Ivana

What follows is the letter that Ivana had written to the person who had previously contacted her.

Hello!

I was very sad, but not surprised, when I read your message. Although I'm only 19 I've traveled a lot and I'm used to people being so...ignorant in a way. They always trust media and have stereotypes which they don't change so easily. And Americans are the worst. You think if you see a report on TV you know everything, you are well informed and when someone brings up the issue, you can participate in conversation. But you never think about what's really happening and you don't really care.

Croatia is a small country in central Europe, people usually consider it to be in Eastern Europe, but that's political location, geographically it's Central and Southern Europe, because it has unusual shape, it looks like a horse-shoe. The shape is a result of history that hasn't been kind in this area. Croatians are Slavic people, we came here in 7th century. We had our own script, it was called Glagoljica, but now we use Latin letters. Our language is called Croatian, and although it's extremely similar to Serbian (we can understand each other without translation) there are important differences in spelling, pronunciation and grammar. Serbo-Croatian language doesn't exist, it only existed for a shorter period of time during Yugoslav regime, and it was an artificial language created by linguists. Croatian is very rich and hard to learn because grammar is similar to Latin. If you ever took Latin you'd see my point.

I wanted to tell you something about history. It's very hard to sum it up in just a few sentences, but I'll try. In the Middle ages Croatian state was one of the most powerful establishments in Mediterranean. Even Venice had to pay taxes to Croatian kings if they wanted their ships to pass through Croatian sea. In 12th century Croatian king Zvonimir died without an heir to the throne and nobles accepted Hungarian kings. From 1102 to 1527 Croatia was ruled by Hungarian kings. In 1527 we elected Austrian dynasty. We became the part of Austro-Hungarian monarchy and although we defended Western world from Turkish conquerors we were always neglected. We were so small and weak and during al those years of foreign rule, we almost forgot who we were. In 19th century we began to express the eagerness to have our own state again. It's very hard to explain what it looked like then, because now there are three main regions in the country and back then those three regions were separated and weren't even considered as a part of the same country.

Anyway, after the World War I, Monarchy collapsed and Croatia joined first Yugoslavian state. It was the first time ever that Croatia cooperated with East, but it was the best solution then. The idea of Southern Slavic people in a same state (Slovenians, Croatians, Serbs) was working only as a theory. Domination of certain nation was obvious. The King was from Serbia, the capital was Belgrade, Serbia, National Treasury was in Belgrade and Croatia was neglected again. Things started to improve when World War 2 started, but then communists took advantage of a situation and created new Yugoslavia, with six republics: Slovenia, Croatia, Bosnia and Herzegovina, Serbia, Monte Negro and Macedonia. In 1980s after Tito's death it was evident that Yugoslavia will not last. Croatia with the beautiful sea had strong economy, we were bankers, managers, merchants. Serbs held leading positions as soldiers and politicians. Communism was not working, the system was corrupted and Slovenia and Croatia started searching their way out. Seven centuries under foreign rule, seven centuries of suppression and neglect, it all became too much. I really do believe that there are always mistakes on both sides when it comes to war. And maybe Croatians really did something that provoked Serbian people, but I'm not and cannot be objective after everything that happened here.

First step was secession, they let us go after long political struggle. Soon after we declared independence, Serbian people in Croatia (before the war there were 30% of them) founded their own state, said that they're being treated unfair in a new Croatian state. Yugoslavian army first claimed to be "Neutral" but after a while they attacked Slovenia. They failed, war in Slovenia only lasted for 10 days. Slovenians were well prepared and ethnic clean, they only had 5% of Serbian people living in their country. Croatia was first attacked in autumn, AD 1991. My town was first attacked on 4th October 1991. UN and EU did nothing. I don't know if you ever heard of Vukovar and what happened there. The entire city was destroyed, men, women and children were executed and put in mass graves. UN and EU did nothing. I survived five years of hell and pain, thousands of people were killed, thousands of homes were destroyed, no one did anything to help. I can't even tell you what kind of things happened here during that war, and explain the consequences. Before the first Serbian attack 16 000 of Serbs fled because they knew what's going to happen to those who stayed. I saw my friends leaving me in hell, now they are coming back. Am I supposed to welcome them back? To offer them new homes, jobs and trust while thousands of Croatian people still wait for their houses to be repaired? Serbians attacked Slovenia, and got away with it. They've attacked Croatia, and what is even worse, gave us a bad reputation. Would you like to come to our seaside for a nice vacation? No, I don't think so, you still think we walk around carrying guns, don't you? They got away with it. They destroyed Bosnia, that's even more popular these days, great idea for Hollywood, isn't it? They got away with it. Right now they are getting away with Kosovo. No one cares. We are east European savages, Balkanians and we can keep killing each other for as long as we like. Americans will make nice movies about it, and they'll have a chance to make nice experiments with different plans and peace solutions. The real work will be done in Iraq and Kuwait, oil is far more important than some poor tribe on Balkan Peninsula.

Croatia is a poor country. We are trying to change our system from communism to capitalism, we have to heal our war wounds and we have to work very hard to brake the barrier which was build by some western countries. There are many problems, but I believe that they will be solved. Young people are going away, they are trying to make better living abroad. An average student from a Croatian high school can accomplish incredible results in USA with minimum of effort. Our school system is extremely hard and strict, we have 17 subjects each year, and we are supposed to be good at everything - from chemistry to English poetry of 17th century. After high school we go to University.There are four Universities in Croatia.Zagreb University.is the largest and oldest Croatian Uni. Zagreb is a Croatian capital, and it's a real European city, with nice architecture, great culture and history.

If you read this letter and become at least a little bit more interested in Croatia, try to find something about Plitvice lakes, unique natural phenomenon, Adriatic sea (Croatian part has 2,000 beautiful islands) and Kopacevski rit. There are so many reasons for me to be proud because I live here: Croatian baron Trenk invented a tye, Croatian national team is third in the world in soccer, Croatian person Nikola Tesla invented electricity etc.I could go on and on. And that's it, if there's anything else you're interested in, I'll be glad to explain and answer all the questions you might have.

Ivana

Jocelyn's Reply, March 27, 1999

Ivana,

I was very happy to receive a letter back from you. I would like to hear about your experiences; you sound like you have had a difficult environment to grow up in, but have had the determination and courage to stand strong.

Has you country been greatly effected by all the disputes and bombings happening in neighboring Kosovo and Serbia? I think that bombing is horrible, but if the Serbian leader is really massacring the ethnic Albanian people.I don't know what to think of my country being involved in stopping him, although I am proud of my country's disciplined military forces and respect them. But it is all so confusing; I don't know what side to believe, sometimes. I suppose war is never really right, and there is probably never a right side - war is so ugly. For the past week I have been corresponding every day with a young woman in Belgrade, Serbia. It is so sad to hear of the distress that she and the others encounter during the bombings, although she has been safe in shelters. She is very bitter against the USA, but does not blame me personally, in fact, she is happy to have someone listen to the other side of the story.Ironic, isn't it, that an American girl and Serbian girl will both be conversing, while my country is bombing hers?

For most every story I have heard on the news about Albanian killings, she has another side of it. Sometimes I wonder just how much both of us are lied to. I believe our journalists to a point, but then some things become questionable - on both sides, and now especially, I imagine, as our journalists were ordered out of Serbia. It is sad that there are deaths on both sides - from whatever perspective you take, we are all alike when it comes to being human beings and having much love for our family. My family has been praying that families that look to God are spared, and I know He will protect them.

So tell me about your experiences.

Sincerely,

Jocelyn

P.S. I know you are neighboring countries with them - how close is the bombing in Serbia and Kosovo to where you live in Croatia?

Ivana's Reply

Hi!

Well, you made some pretty interesting points in your letter. First of all, about my personal experiences. I live in Karlovac, 50 km from Croatian capital, Zagreb, 500 km from Belgrade in Serbia, 1,140 km from Pristina, Kosovo. So, that's pretty far away I suppose. :-)

I was.[a young girl] when Croatia claimed independence from Yugoslavia. In 1990 it was evident they will not let us go peacefully. However nobody here ever dreamed of what was about to happen. Imagine this: you're living peacefully, you never question your friends' nationality. And then all of the sudden, a madman 500 km away starts spreading lies and panic. You're not taking him serious, but your friends are. Imagine seeing your family and neighbors leaving the city, going away to the other side to shoot at you, destroy everything you built together. We simply couldn' t imagine that happening, but it did. There were 20,000 Serbs in my town in 1990. After Milosevic told them they are going to be mistreated by new Croatian government, 16,000 of them went away to the so called Serbian Krajina, their quasi state in Croatia. Everything started in autumn in 1991. We had a couple of air raids in August. And then first attacks in September. And then October. I will never forget that October as long as I live. I remember every single day, every single minute. Thank God, I was just a child, I thought everything was just a game. I can't imagine what was my mother going through. There's nothing to tell really. It was hell. One improvised shelter, twenty people in it and 4,000 shells a day. Ground was shaking,we couldn't go out for days. Then someone said that Serbs are coming and we'll be all executed. We fled. That was the first time I cried. Then and never again.

I forgot everything about the four years that followed. I can just remember dark, tears, fear and desperation. After a while people got used to situation, accepted it as normal. That was the only way we could go on with our lives. I remember how I used to lay on my bed in basement and stare at the light bulb, feeling nothing, praying for the next shell to kill me. I couldn't stand it any more at that point. That's when first went.[abroad]. I spent one beautiful summer there. It took time to get used to peace. I was shaking when someone would slam the door. And then, when summer was over I had to go back. I almost fainted when plane landed.I was so upset. That night I was talking to my sister, and it started again. She started to cry, "No, not again, they never did it while it was raining. They can't do it tonight." Of course they could. There was no one there to stop them. There was only one thing keeping me alive, memory of.[abroad]. I wanted to go back, so I did. And I still do. :-) You see, in the beginning we thought Americans will come and help us, stop it all. Nobody did anything. So, the hope was gone. We only had ourselves, and we succeeded. War finished in 1995. Problems were still there. I couldn't stand Serbian people.I was so bittered and disappointed watching same thing happening in Bosnia again and no one giving damn about it.I think I wanted them [Yugoslavia] to feel how it was to suffer. Now 4 years had gone by.they [Serbs] did such terrible things to us. I should hate them, I should avoid any contact with them. They are evil and they are all hypocrites. No they are not. They are just people. And I don't believe that people can be bad just because their skin is not the same color as mine, or becauseof their nationality. People are individuals, they cannot be categorized. They can only be good or bad, and that has nothing to do with their appearance or origin. There are still lots of bad feelings between Serbians and Croatians. I give a fair chance to everybody: if he/she proves to be a nice person I will accept him/her as my friend.for the sake of wonderful people that live there.

I believe NATO is finally doing the right thing. A little bit late, but they are putting a stop to this mess. If they let Milosevic to get away with Kosovo, he will do it again somewhere else. And the tragic fact is he's getting his people's support. I see all those demonstrations in front of embassies and I can't believe what politics and media can do.

As far as your friend is concerned, I believe she's in distress.we were all expecting this, and I was absolutely out of my mind when it began.I was told that everything's fine. They are just destroying military targets, civilians are not in danger. Of course I'm worried, there can always be a mistake or something, but I believe that this is controlled military action, and civilian victims will be minimized. And you must bear in mind that Serbian television is a bit different than Western TV. Believe me, almost everything those people are getting are lies. There were student demonstrations in Belgrade last year, the motto was: "Shut Serbian TV down, give your brain a chance" .

I say a prayer every night for all innocent souls to be spared. I pray for peace and the very thought of another war terrifies me. I finally sorted out my life, my feelings. I want to go on. I want to finish.[school] which I love, get married, have children....War is definitely something I don't want.

OK, I could go on and on on the subject, but it's time for me to go now.

Regards,

Ivana

Jocelyn's Reply, March 31, 1999

Dear Ivana,

Your letter was deeply touching. I cannot tell you how it reached me, reached my soul. Your experiences are truly amazing. You have been through war, death, fear, but have come out as such a dynamically strong young woman.After I read your letter.my perspective.changed.

I do think that maybe NATO's approach is a little off-balanced.they plan on bombing again and again.The other day they held this big rock concert in celebration of downing our F-177, while NATO was bombing, to show NATO and the USA that they are not afraid.I am not for the bombing. I hate war. I hate bombing.

The girl in Belgrade is not responding.anymore.It is sad. I wanted to befriend her.

You have a very insightful onlook. Your letter really touched me, an got me to thinking what is happening.Also, on the news here we are sitting in our homes, watching these poor ethnic Albanians traveling over mountains for miles and crossing into other countries where they are sometimes refused. Our troops should be there helping them get through, get to safety. These people are even being rejected, after traveling by train into I think it was Macedonia, the train was sealed up, the people told not to speak, and only a selected amount were let off, and the rest sent back. Can you believe it?

This year I am participating in.[she explains the delopment of the global relations site].

You have a very big heart, and it blessed me to see how much you care for all the innocent people. War can be so ugly. It can turn neighbor against neighbor, country against country, and even brother against brother. Unfortunately, innocent people are caught up in the midst of all of this. But God protects those who look to him, and I firmly believe that.I really like how you speak of people. How you give everyone an equal chance, whatever nationality they are. I think you should pursue your dreams.That's what you want - to live a normal life after all these years. You are very inspirational.

It is because of you, and future generations that my team and I are doing this project. And stories like yours reach into people's souls as it did mine, and have the potential to get people to really site up and think. To think of what is happening. To have a will to understand. And most importantly, to educate our children. So much of our future lies in our children. And so many are not getting the education that they deserve.That stirs within me.

I have had such an amazing experience talking to people like you. It has made me think hard about all of this.

Sincerely,

Jocelyn

Ivana's Reply, April 5, 1999

Hi!

I'm so sorry it took me so long to reply to your last letter.I just found it yesterday. :-)

I'm glad I helped you to answer at least some of the questions you had about this terrible situation. And I have nothing against you putting my thoughts on your web site. I think it's a great initiative, and I totally support the idea.

I think that my town really does need help. It's been heavily damaged in war, and now there's absolutely nothing: Karlovac has a population of about 80,000 people and we don't even have a cinema!.I know how ignorant people can be, and usually are and I think that you're doing the great thing. Keep up the good work!!!

Yes... Serbian people turned into some kind of fanatics these days.I've seen the concert on the TV and I couldn't believe my eyes! Of course they are hurt, and of course that bombing is making them angry and frustrated, but this is not a normal reaction. If something like this happens to you, you should sit down and think about everything, try to find the causes by yourself. They should see what their government is doing. I can only hope that they will realize the truth after some time, nothing else.

Yesterday was Easter Sunday, and we all prayed for Kosovars.We are sending clothes and food, and can only hope it will reach those poor people on time. It's nice to see people finally doing something.

It was nice to hear from you again.

Ivana

Jocelyn and Ivana continued to correspond over the next few months. It was truly a very educational and enlightening experience, to hear the perspective of this young woman.

During our interviews, we developed a set of questions to ask. Ivana gave us some very thoughtful answers, and the interview can be viewed by clicking the link below.