Jokes

Billy Graham tells the story of a recruiting coach who was most eager for a certain ball player to be accepted by his college, so the coach arranged for an interview between the athlete and the dean. “If you are able to answer one simple question, we'll admit you to the college,” said the dean. Then he asked, “How many are six and six?”The athlete thought for a minute, then answered, “Thirteen.”
There was silence. Then the coach broke in, “Aw, Dean, let him in. He only missed it by two."
A junk man came down the street where a woman was sweeping her walk.
“Any old beer bottles?” he asked the woman.
Self-righteously the woman retorted, “Do I look like the kind of person who would drink beer?”
“Pardon me,” apologized the junk man. “Any old vinegar bottles?"

A soldier in the front lines during the Korean War was having domestic difficulties. His wife would send him annoying letters. Unable to stand it any longer, he wrote her, “Stop arguing with me. I want to fight this war in peace!"
A young jeweler was being married. The minister asked for the ring, then gave it to the jeweler to put on his bride's finger. “With this ring,” prompted the minister. “With this ring,” the bridegroom nervously repeated, then added, “We give a written guarantee, promising the customer that the price will be refunded if it is not satisfactory.”

Little June at a fashionable wedding didn't miss a single detail. She saw the bride come up the aisle with her father, then go down the aisle with the groom. “Mother, did the lady change her mind? She went up the aisle with one man and came back with a different one."